The lies they spoke contradicted themselves "just a BLOB of TISSUE" and you can have many more babies later when you are older. I never once heard about the damage or let alone the risk I was taking to have an abortion. I was told, "This was going to be the best thing for me". Our heads were spinning and we bought into the lies, one that cost me many sleepless nights, sobbing and crying, shame, emotional, physical and spiritual consequences. Everyone said an abortion would be the best thing for me, but I never felt that way at all. When I left the abortion clinic, I felt like a part of me died that day too. Too ashamed to tell anyone how I felt, I buried my feelings deep, deep inside. The hurt and pain of killing my baby ran very deep and was real!

Someone asked me a question a few years ago, "If my abortion was a wound, what would it look like?" It would cover my whole heart, a deep gaping hole with infectious pus coming out of it. See, the pain and grief of my decision that I made back thirty-two years ago will affect my life negatively forever if I continue to believe the lies I had been told. Shame and grief has kept me quiet for way too long.

I finished my senior year, graduated and then married my boyfriend. We thought we could marry, never speak about the abortion and our love would heal the hurt we were both feeling. I was never allowed to grieve the child I lost, and, believe me, my baby was a precious gift--a baby girl. By the time you discover you are pregnant, your child is fully formed with arms, legs, eyes, fingers, toes, etc. Please check the facts. Well, we never spoke about that day, we buried it deep inside, never grieving our loss together and one year later I was moving back home with my parents seeking a divorce.